And then I started crying

This morning I opened my What’s App message from my youngest son, and then I started crying.

“Are we cancelling the flights?” was all he had written; and with this simple questions my eyes filled with tears.

And even as I write this, they are still falling.

You see, they were supposed to be joining me in just 11 days.

Both of them together.

The last time we were together in person, just the three of us, was 14 months ago.

That’s a long time since we were the Travelling Trio on the road together .

Memories flooded to the surface and then I started crying all over again.

I saw them both individually 7 and 8 months ago; and I see them pretty much every day through the screen of my phone or my laptop.

But the thought of holding them both together in my arms, of kissing them both, and breathing them in deeply was a moment I was looking forward to the most.  

Yes we were going to have some incredible adventures around Argentina, but to just be able to hold my boys,

feel them next to me,

to just have them put their arms around me at any random given moment…

these are the moments I miss the most.

And yes, I know there are going to be people out there who will tell me “serves you right, you left them with their dad” and “what did you expect when you left them to go sailing around the world?”

But to these people, I send love, because they are living in judgement of others, without knowing the full story.

You see I dive deep into whether I have done the right thing by leaving my boys with their dad on a regular basis.

I have to.

I dive deep into the emotions, beliefs and challenges which come up for me daily, unblocking any potential blindspots which maybe holding me back.

I know this is only a temporary set back.

A postponement of their visit.

It is not a cancellation of it, just a delay.

And we all experience delays in our lives; and if we are honest with ourselves, we cause a lot of our own delays.

When we just keep moving through the emotions, as I am doing now, the tears stop falling, as they did a few sentences ago.

I have received more messages from my eldest and we are having a family meeting after my podcast interview in less than two hours.

It’s all good.

Emotions when we dive into them help us explore options, get creative and come up with new answers.

I know I am not going to cancel their flights, and the stubborn arse in me doesn’t even want to postpone the flights.

There is something deep inside of me which tells me the fear and hysteria has 11 days to die down and they will still be able to fly.

Governments will come to their senses…. if they had any at all in the beginning, and with the number of people recovering quickly and the breakthroughs happening, I know everything will be just fine.

Will the travel bans be lifted before the boys are due to fly?

Well, that will depend on whether the UK and Argentina choose to step out of fear and work together on this issue.

How likely that is given their history in the past, heaven only knows!

But I am choosing to remain positive.

I can only control one thing, and that is what is going on inside of me.  It is why I choose to eat healthily, it is why I choose to read and watch positive and informative content; and why I choose to write content in the way I do.

I sent my son the Bill Gates Ted Talk on where Bill predicted this kind of outbreak back in 2014.  How many people listened to him? How many people were even wanting to be ready?

And I repeat this last bit… “How many people were even wanting to be ready?”

My son is studying Computer Science, Physics and Further Maths, and loves the world of Dungeons and Dragons… for me he is a beautiful mix of the ancient and the modern, and incredibly smart…

Sometimes a little too smart for his own good, but that’s a different story!

My boys and I message each other daily with Ted Talks, Meme’s, articles, photos and messages of love and cheeky banter.

Without WiFi this global book tour and research trip for my next series of books would have been a lot harder to deal with.

As a mother who loves the outdoor life, I have hated my boys being on their tech so much.

“Get outside and play” I would say to them when they were little.  5 and 6 hour hikes in the Peak District National Park we would take on a Sunday with our dog.

We would spend hours in the park, weekends on road trips, and when we are together, nothing really changes.  We still have mad adventures, and we always will.

This challenge is a different kind of adventure.  Do we postpone or change the flights to somewhere else? Do I move up the Americas to Brazil? Because the event that is planned here in Buenos Aries is now going to be online, which I can do from anywhere.

I wanted to go to Iguazu Falls with the boys, take them horse riding, watch them enjoy ‘the best steak in the world’ and show them the Tango at one of the most amazing theatres here in Argentina, but maybe this isn’t the time.

Maybe it is time for me to move on and meet them in Rio?

Who knows what is going to happen in the next few days, next few hours even!

All we can do is just move forward, feel into the emotions, acknowledge them and allow them to show us what they need to show us, take what is needed from them and then move on.

Right now, for me, it is time to prepare for my podcast interview, have a coffee and some lunch, and then send some documents and workbooks to my clients.

Wherever we are physcially, mentally, financially and emotionally, we also have a choice on whether we stay in that space.  We always get to create a new vision, we always get to learn, we always get to sit and reflect on if where we are, is where we want to be.

This morning I posted some journalling questions on Facebook for those who are resisting being at home, the response has already been an interesting one.

Having just had another message from my youngest, I know he is now home from school.

He has sent a big massive grin through What’s App because I have told him we are not cancelling, just postponing…

And now it is time to sign off here, and go and speak with him, with them both… before I add photos, SEO, slugs etc to the rest of this post, and before my podcast interview, which I will of course share with you here once it is available.

Family first right? And just like this photo shows, my boys and I always create bridges… regardless of where we are.

Thank God I have lived through civil war and nearly died three times

“Thank God I have lived through civil war and nearly died three times”.

A thought which went through my head the other day, and one I have shared with my sons.

Some may find it a strange thing to say, but by now you will have realised I don’t tend to worrry too much about what others things about what I say.

Unless of course it impacts my boys, and then the Mama Fire will come out and bite you on the arse!

You see, living through the Egyptian Uprising, and nearly dying three times has already taught me about what it is like to face my own mortality and take care of my health.

I have already lived under curfew and know these are some of the most productive times of our lives, if we allow it.

Isn’t this why we tell our children they are not allowed to have TV or game time until homework is done and their dinner eaten?

Or why we ground them to enourage them to consider their actions if they have acted out of character or caused harm or disrespect to themselves or others?

Most of the time I guess you could say I am in a self imposed curfew anyway.

There are things which are non negotiables in my life, and I do not tend to go to most places unless they nourish my bod, mind and soul.

What’s the point?

I would only be stealing from my own future and my own dreams if I chose to do things and be in places which take me away from where I want to be anyway.

Speaking with my youngest son the other day about the crazy hysteria going on around us at the moment, we were discussing the lifestyles and health conditions of those who are ‘reported’ to have died.

  • How old were they?
  • What kind of lifestyle did they have?
  • Which health issues did they have?
  • What were their mindset and positivity levels like?
  • Were they active?
  • What foods and drinks did they put into their bodies?
  • And why is it we are not seeing the images of those who have reportedly died from this virus?

And isn’t it interesting it seems to be affecting certain groups of the world’s population which is costing the government and healthy care systems around the world the most amount of money?

If it is so dangerous, then why are the homeless not being better taken care of?

And why has this virus been known about for years and a vaccine not created and already tested on humans?

Take the company Inovia who have just pocketed $208million in the last 2 months, having not had a product to market in 40 years…

Or how about the US Military developed the virus and introduced it into Wuhan days before the ‘pandemic’ started?

New York Times reporter says “there is not a shred of evidence to support this claim” but where is the evidence of all the people who are dying, the real hard facts and data to support this mass hysteria?

All we are seeing and hearing are projected numbers, heresay, and government incompetence the world over, again calling into question the leadership of those in power.

And for those of us who are smarter than the average bear, we know the only way the government control the populations in their country is to introduce another fear into the public domain.

This way they can make us afraid of travelling or visiting a specific country, become afraid of each other, introduce another vaccine which has knock on effects to our health, or release any other scare tactic they so desire so we follow like the lemmings they wish us to be.

Governments pass shocking education changes on the bottom of anti-terror legislation because we will never question anti-terror laws.

The WHO allows food manufacturers to put toxins such as weedkiller and rat poison into cereals such as Cheerios.

The WHO and FSA allow sugar to be added to foods, marketed to kids and devoured by the masses knowing it is more addictive than cocaine, and knowing it is one of the best ways to raise acidity in our bodies.

And what grows at alarming rates in an acidic environment?

Cancer.

The governments around the world, and the media stations are allowing false numbers, irresponsible journalism to be  propagated BECAUSE it is generating global fear, and when we are afraid, we don’t think, we just act.

Living through the Uprising in Egypt and facing my own mortality has given me insights not many people have.

Living through civil war and nearly dying three times has taught me to let go of the fear of dying; to embrace each moment.

These experiences also taught me to make the most of my life, to live my dream and spend as much quality time with my children as possible.

And for some who know I am away from my children at the moment, this might sound like a contradiction.

The quality time I spent with them on video calls almost daily, the opportunities they get to travel the world, and the 1:1 time we get together when they are with me, just enjoying life, has been incredible.

They are due to arrive with me in the next two weeks.  Who knows if this will happen, but we are just moving forward and getting on with life.  No fear, no stress and no worries.

What will be, will be.

The more we stress and worry, the more our bodies will become stressed, the more chance we have of getting ill.

This is also a really great time to get productive, spending quality time with family, getting jobs done around the house, writing the book you have always wanted to write, taking a good hard look at life choices, time to dive deep into what you want out of life.

It is time to create a new vision for the future, one where you are better equipped for all life throws at you.

It is time to rise and let go of the fears and hysteria created by those who wish to control us all.

It is time to start asking smarter questions of ourselves, and of our so called leaders; because remember at the end of the day they are all civil servants, and they are here to serve the civilians, not lie, manipulate and deceive us all.

There is a lot more to this fiasco than meets the eye, and it is very interesting to see how Vietnam, Thailand and China have contained this situation.

It is also interesting to see how the governments with the most arrogance and ego are the ones who are failing the global citizens of the world the most.

My time here in Argentina is almost up.  I am yearning for the beach, and I am just going to keep moving forward.  If my children are unable to fly out to be with me, and I have to amend their flights, then I will deal with that when the time comes.

In the meantime, I have books to write for clients, my own books to write, clients to coach and a lot more avocados, peanut butter and sauerkrut to eat.

Life is great.  Life is a beautiful gift, time with loved ones is precious, and it is a shame so many are wasting this time by stressing out and fighting with others over who gets the last packet of pasta and tomato sauce…

Which by the way, will raise your cortisol levels, along with all the other processed foods so many have been buying… and what does this lead to?

Yep, you guessed it… Diabetes 2… a self inflicted dis-ease; one the pharma companies then ‘help you’ get under control with the meds they produce,

Which makes them money so they can then fund the government agendas,

So they can pretty much create whatever they like because they funded the elections which means the muppets in roles of leadership turn a blind eye to what is going on, and then feign ignorance.

Oh, and just in case you didn’t know testing viruses on the human population isn’t new, and neither is chemical warfare.  Wikipedia may not be the final answer to all your questions, but it is a great place to start.

Living through civil war and nearly dying three times may have taught me to value life and live each moment fully, but being a geek and the annoying child who always asked why, developed my curiosity which led me to ask smart questions.

Where can you start asking smarter questions?

What fears can you face head on and let go of?

What life choices are you going to make from now on which have a more positive impact on your life?

It’s time to get smarter, time to rise even higher, and it’s time to get really curious.

And remember, live to laugh and laugh to live, it is the best way to reduce stress and cortisol.

Ciao for now x