author coaching – Dawn Bates

“Your message is messy, no-one knows what you do”

“You need to stick to one thing and just promote that”

“Your social media needs a make-over”

“What is it you do exactly?”

How many times have you had others in the branding and marketing business come to you and say these comments to you?

I know I’ve had quite a few; and yes, at the beginning my messaging was a little confusing, but then again, I was confused.

I had a lot going on in my private life and I was trying to figure out how to make sense, and money, from the 20 plus years of entrepreneurship and community regeneration experience I have.

Which area of my expertise did I want to focus on?

Which of my passions did I want to harness?

And the thing is,

WE ALL HAVE STUFF going on in our lives we are trying to figure out, so to have someone we don’t know tell us what we need to be doing, how we should be showing up is just something we don’t need in our lives.

It can be even worse when people we do know, who have some idea of what’s going on, but haven’t reached out to ask us how we are and if we need anything, then start telling us what we need to do with our own business.

The words ‘Yuck Fou!’ and other emotional sentences come to the fore and before long, it’s not only feathers we are spitting.

We are seething, feeling like it is another thing we are getting wrong, another level of frustration and just another thing on our already heavy workload.

‘Why can’t everyone else just mind their own bloody business instead of interfering with mine when they know nothing about me?”

A phrase I know went through my head more than once I can tell you!

And here’s the thing (you knew one was coming!)

The people who cannot see your messaging, cannot see you for a reason. They may think your message is messy but your message maybe a deeper message than they are currently able to pick up on.

If your message is messy to them, then maybe consider they are not in the right place to see the depth of your message.

Consider they are not meant to resonate with where you are at or work with you, because they are just not your kind of person; especially if they have not had the common courtesy to reach out to you before they start telling you what is wrong with you, and your business.

And we all know common courtesy, like common sense, isn’t all that common these days, nor are manners, but hey, that’s another post for another time!

Being in business is a bit like becoming a mother, every woman and her opinions come out in full force telling you how to be great at doing this, that and the other.

Very rarely do they take the time to understand who you are, what you already know, your experiences thus far and what your intentions and goals are for the future.

No, they just come with opinions, advice, observations and the sales pitches for this product, service and casserole dish.

When I started sailing around the world, researching captaincy and the world of sailing for one of my up and coming series of books, it seemed as though every captain and fellow sailor I met thought I’d only been born the day before.

Very few asked me about my previous experiences in life, any of the skills outside of sailing or about my life. All they were interested in was how long I had been sailing.

And I get it. We were off sailing, so understanding my level of knowledge in sailing was the key ingredient in the mix.

Many of them were surprised when I was able to fix sails, figure out the rigging, understand how to clean and maintain the boat, assess and prepare provisions, organise the legalities and do a stock check for entering new countries, or how to lead others on the boat without actually being a captain.

My skills were lost on them simply because I didn’t come from a sailing family or hadn’t been sailing for very long.

The arrogance and judgement in the sailing world is at times disgusting, as you will find out when you read The Mermaid’s Guide to Hitch Hiking, and The Mermaid’s Guide to Leadership when they are completed.

The same goes for business.

I may be an author and author coach, a writer for various magazines such as House of PreEminence and One Tribe but this does not mean I have no business experience.

My social media presence may not be all pattern, pastel and predictable, but then again, nor am I, and I am guessing neither are you.

We are human, we are all beautiful messy in our realness.

Sometimes we have offers to promote, sometimes we are celebrating family moments, other times we are sharing our fitness journey’s, and sometimes we are just taking a time out.

Some of us are naturally gifted when it comes to tech skills and doing all the fancy-fancy animations and filming, for others, we are more adept at expressing ourselves through words and a simple photo.

At the end of the day though, our social media messaging may be messy to others, but it is our message not theirs.

When we show up as who we are in the moment, people get to relate to us, they get to know us, they get to see the human side of us, if they take the time to.

Those who do not take the time to get to know you, find out what you are about, are these the people you really want to do business with?

So the next time someone tells you “your message is messy” consider how well they know you, your intentions for the future.

When someone tells you what you ‘should’ or ‘should not’ be doing with your business, listen to yourself.

Is there a doubt?

How did your body respond?

Step back, take a moment, and breathe.

Are you happy with your message?

Are you clear on your message?

Do you know why you share what you do?

Your message is messy to some people because they may not be owning all of who they are, choosing to be a one trick pony.

Your message is messy to some because they cannot see beyond the obvious, they may not be as deep as you, and that is OK.

And so are you.

With love, as always,

Dawn

*Messaging is something I go into with my clients because as authors we get to have a level of freedom to show up in a multitude of ways. Freedom of speech and the authority we have opens doors to a vast array of media opportunities, a wider variety of audiences. With this level of freedom comes responsibility to break the patterns of thought, to disrupt the status quo and make a huge difference in the world.

I currently have 2 openings for 1:1 clients to work with me on a 3, 6, 9 or 12 month basis. There is also the opportunity to join me for my 7 Week Intensive Author Course Programme working 1:1 on all areas of your author life and business.

If you are interested to know more, then book in for a discovery call and let’s see where the journey takes us. Until then, have an awesome week and keep believing in YOU and YOUR MESSAGE!

One of the phrases I used to hear teachers say to pupils back in my teaching days was “Why can’t you just tell the truth?”.

One of the things we long for as parents, and actively encourage, is for our chidren to tell the truth.

In relationships we want the truth.

As employees, we want our bosses to tell us the truth about the future of our jobs.

Those of us who work in coaching, therapy or counselling roles make it clear to our clients that the process will only work if and only if there is complete honesty in the relationship.

So why is it then, when we are faced with someone else’s truth, we shy away or condemn them?

Why is it, we hide who we are, refusing to speak up about the things which matter most to us?

Why do we keep quiet about the things we truly feel?

And why do we allow others to silence us, make us feel as if we are the enemy when we speak our truths?

Over the last few months I have achieved more in my business than ever before. I have gained more clients, brought on a new team member, invested with a new coach, started the rebranding process of my business and invested in a business mastermind.

I am not telling you these things to brag, but things in the business world are not as scary as you have been led to believe they are.

Yes, some businesses are closing.

Yes, some people are signing on for government handouts and bail outs, but would these people be doing this if they were innovating and investing in themselves, and / or their businesses?

Not at all.

I have yet to meet a business owner in my circle who is going of out business, and I have yet to meet a person in my circle who is being made redundant.

Why?

Because we ALL INVEST in ourselves and our businesses.

I have been completely online for over 3 years, have always been at the forefront of bleeding edge technology.

As the first woman to sell touch screens and DVDs into the UK business market, I had to get used to the idea of people looking at me as if I was selling them something that had come from another galaxy.

Times are challenging at the moment for many people, and I have been shocked at the number of lies out there which people are buying into.

I am surprised at quite a few people in my circle of friends who have started lying to themselves and fooling themselves on so many levels.

People around the world are jumping on the bandwagon of celebrating the medical professionals for the work they are doing, and whilst this is commendable in many ways, it stinks of the hypocrisy I wrote about recently over on my facebook page.

The public are causing so many of their own health problems with the poisons they put in their body with each and every meal, and most of the drinks they consume throughout the day.

Governments around the world have closed the ‘non essential’ stores such as the health food stores, and left open the food delivery places which fill your body with processed this, that and the other; and the beloved white substance more addictive than cocaine, sugar.

Health care professionals, such as dentists, have been made to close their surgeries, leaving those of us who need treatments, operations and dental treatment the only option of purchasing anitbiotics and painkillers.

(Follow the money and where that leads).

Many of you who have been following this blog for a while now will remember how I wrote about needing new teeth following my ocean crossing from mainland Europe to the Canary Islands.

My front teeth need the next level of work doing, and I have an infection which needs to be dealt with.

I have already completed once course of antibiotics, and half way through the next course; and my body has responded in some interesting ways.

You see, I eat and drink clean.

I have not used deodorant in close to 3 years.

Now for many of you that might sound disgusting, but when you consider I work out 6 days out of 7, do not eat processed food, meat or dairy, my body doesn’t excrete the awful smells many of you will experience.

Since taking these antibiotics, I have had to dig out my salt crystal deodorant and start using it again. Ever wondered what truths your body is telling you about the things you eat and drink?

We want people to tell the truth, but the truth of the matter is, very few of us even know our own truth.

Millions of people around the world are obsessed with the “number of people dying because of COVID-19″ and yet we ignore the 500,000 people who die on average each year from human violence, or the 120,000 people who die due to war.

Or how about the 800,000 people who commit suicide due to various mental health issues and the 1.5 million people who die on average each year from diabetes?

These two illnesses are already on the increase due to the quarantine situations around the world, a situation which is making more people feel isolated and left to eat the crap food produced and approved of by the World Health Organisation (WHO) and Food Standards Agencies (FSA) around the world.

(Again, I encourage you to follow the money).

And if you ask me, the FSA’s, WHO, and governments around the world, which allow foods which increase ill health, contain weed killers, rat poisons and increase acidity in our bodies, which is a wonderful breeding ground for cancers by the way, are committing corporate manslaughter right underneath our noses; and yet we happily oblige them with our ignorance.

Why do you think they have been able to pull the wool over our eyes for so long and it has been so easy to roll out the passive aggressive, softly, softly catchy monkey style dictatorships across the ‘developed’ world in the recent months?

When looking at the vast differences in the restrictions being imposed on people around the world, and the reported number of so called COVID-19 deaths, which in my opinion are vastly exaggerated and inflated, as all government statistics have been since the 1100’s in Europe, and back to Pharaonic times in Ancient Egypt, it is as plain as day the corruption within governments and the big pharmas is rife.

Governments have been lying to us all for years, and trying to control us. If you have read my second book ‘Walaahi’ you’ll have already learnt how I dealt with living under ’emergency’ martial law and curfew during the Egyptian Uprising.

(You’ll also have learnt how I have never allowed any one or anything to stop me, and how you can learn to do the same).

You see, governments only try and control us because they are afraid of what will happen if they don’t. Fear is the fundamental basis of why anything is controlled.

Fear of a fire spreading.

Fear of wreckless driving.

Fear of freedom and independent speech.

It is why many people ask me “Aren’t you afraid of what might happen to you now you’ve shared what you have in your books?”

The answer is no. I am not afraid of what will happen to me.

I am more afraid of living a lie and letting my boys down.

When coaching my clients, one of the biggest transformations they have is the ability to own and speak their truth.

Why? because if we are afraid to speak our truth, we hold negative emotions inside of our bodies which lead to ill health and dis-ease.

Speaking my truth may not make me very popular with a lot of people, but it brings the right people into my inner circle, and makes my inner circle a very beautiful and powerful place to be.

It’s not always easy to speak our truth, but considering we want people to tell the truth when in our space, isn’t it about time we started to tell the truth ourselves?

Isn’t it about time we actively seek out the truth, rather than allowing ourselves to be lied to over and over again?

Isn’t it about time we demand the truth from ourselves and our governments, like we as parents and teachers ask the children in our care to tell the truth?

Or are we going to continue to live a life of ignorance and double standards?

*If you are ready to write with truth and integrity, fed up writing stuff that you know isn’t from your highest self, then book a Truth Slaying Writers Unblock session with me, and let’s take your writing to a whole new level of power.