Show your human side

Yesterday on a call with a dear friend of mine, she said “It’s nice to see you cry, and see you show your human side Dawn”

And then she said “Well you know, not nice to see you cry, but you know what I mean.  You’re always so positive and happy”.

And she’s right, I am always so positive and happy, what do I have to be miserable of negative about?

The tears were due to the happiness of knowing I’m going to be with my boys in 5 weeks time here in Buenos Aries.

I haven’t been able to hug them since July and August last year due to crossing the Atlantic and heading up to Buenos Aries to deliver the next round of the 7 Week Author Course for Feminine Alphas.

I then got emotional again during our call when she praised me for the leadership I am giving to my boys, how proud of me she is, and all the other wonderful words she said to me.

Last week another one of my dear friends took the time to acknowledge the fact that this journey cannot be easy for me.

“Dawn you are travelling around the world by yourself, away from your boys, your dogs, family and friends.  You constantly do the inner work and are relentless in your productivity, AS WELL AS travelling the world by yourself, navigating laws, cultures and languages.  I am so proud of you honey!”

I cried then too.

Two days after that, another of my dearest friends told “Will you just get present to what you have achieved Dawn! Look at how far you have come in just 2 years.  You’re AMAZING!”

Again the happy tears flowed.

These three beautiful women, yep all women, stepped into my world and saw how challenging this journey is for me at times.

It isn’t easy, but neither was pregnancy, and neither has been raising children; but like most other women who are blessed to have children (and it is a blessing), we still went ahead and grew a baby inside of ourselves, gave birth and raised some pretty spectacular humans.

My friend yesterday got me thinking about what it actually means to ‘show your human side’ and our perception of others.

I am a very honest person, wear my heart on my sleeve, as some would say.

I go off on passionate rants, giggle lots during live streams (when I do them) and do my best not to scratch when those blood sucking mosquitoes bite the heck out of my juicy, sweet tasting body.

I get excited when friends succeed. I go all gooey and mushy when I see dogs; And when I see these two beauties in this photo, I am probably going to get more excited than them, then cry my eyes out with more happy tears!

(I do promise not to pee all over them with excitement though, as they are more than likely going to do to me when I scoop them up off the floor in my arms!)

Yep, tears are welling up now.

And it is not because I am sad.

It is just from the love I have for them, and the happiness I know I am going to feel as I fall to the floor and have them both clambering all over me and following me around everywhere I go when we are reunited.

(Another reason to haul arse and get my yacht, so they too can come live with me! Got their life jackets and yacht guards sorted already!!).

I am a big softie.

I cry at happy moments in movies.

I cover my face with a cushion when I get tricked into watching horror movies; and then because I am so into the movie and need to know what happens next, I sit there gripping the cushion like my life depends on it.

I would say like a white knuckle rollercoaster, but my arms are more than likely to be in the air with me laughing on one of those!

“Show your human side” is something I do with my writing, my coaching, when I am speaking on podcasts, radio, TV or the stage (You can book me here for any of those)

Yesterday I got voted ‘Article of the Week‘ on LinkedIn and I was so humbled that someone could nominate my writing for that title when there are so many wonderful writers in her space.

I walk along the street, head in a book, or in amazement at the plants and trees; and when I lay down on the grass or the deck of a boat I am always looking at the clouds to see what images I can make out within them.

I am scared of love, and if a man tries to speak with me about anything more than a subject I have written about, or business in one way or another, I surrounded myself with armour and want to go hide in the Safe Room in my mind and soul.

Being in a relationship is something I would love to experience again, but after my divorce, and the last relationship I was in, I don’t even go out at night to socialise.

I much prefering to stay home and read a book or watch a Spanish film, TV Series or documentary, so I can improve my Spanish. (Loving Les Chicas de Cable at the moment on Netflix!)

If I go out, it is during the day to a cafe to read, write or meet new friends; and of course the visit to the shops to buy my avocados and peanut butter.

You see even though I don’t share all of this ‘human side of me’, it doesn’t mean I am putting on a brave face or positive smile all the time.

I am genuinely a really positive person, always have been, always will be.  It’s just the way I am.

There is so much to be grateful for in life.  So much.

There is so much to be happy about. Really, truly there is.

I mean, just look at those two little faces next to me in the photo!! How cute are they!?

And if they don’t make you happy, well the look of surprise on my face should make you chuckle! And if you knew what I was saying to the photographer James Barton , trust me, you would be laughing!

I used to feel sorry for people who couldn’t find the positives in every negative, used to think people were just really ungrateful, but now I realise these people just don’t have the tools needed in life to discover gratitude.

I know I am what some would say very lucky, but just like Samuel Goldwyn says “The harder I work, the luckier I get”. I do work hard, but I also work smart, and it is the combined efforts of this relentless effort, gratitude, high energy and joy at the simple things in life, which bring me all this ‘luck’.

Sometimes the ‘human side’ of others shocks me.  Like a comment made by someone else the other day to me in a message, where she was having a passive spiteful and jealous dig at my ‘no doubt luxury location’.

Sometimess this ‘human side’ is ugly, and that’s OK.

It’s a wake up call of how not to be, and to be aware of the energy we send out into the world.

It doesn’t matter how people try and take back what they said on how it was meant, the energy sent with it still lands.

I just felt sad for this woman that she couldn’t look out of her own window, or at her own surroundings and feel happy about the place she chooses to be in, rather than her being blind to the real abundance and luxury in her own life.

As for you all seeing me cry, well I am not really one to take photos of myself.

I have had to learn to do this, but it’s not really my thing even when I am in a great space, so when I am crying or feeling a bit ‘meh’ as my youngest son calls it, I am not going to start taking photos, adjusting the light, setting up a selfie.

I would rather feel into the emotions coming up for me, acknowledge them, discover why they are there and then have the ugly crying, snotty runny nose moments all to myself.

They don’t happen often, because I know how to do self care, and as you read at the beginning of this post, I have some really wonderful girlfriends who are there to support me.

Life is great.

Life is simple.

Life can be confusing, and messy, but on the whole, when you look at the amazing piece of engineering we are, and the beautiful planet and eco-systems surrounding us, life if pretty fucking amazing!

So why not choose happiness?

Why not choose to live to laugh and laugh to live?

Because when we do, and we choose gratitude and joy, life takes on a whole new level of wonderment.

Enjoy your day folks, and be you, show your human side, all of them, whenever and however being human feels for you in any given moment.

With love, as always,

Dawn x

 

What’s in a brand?

Time and time again we as business owners are told by the marketing experts we are never going to have a successful business unless we have slick and sexy branding.

And whilst I agree we need to have a professional look and feel to our business to instill trust in others, being ‘too professional’ and ‘too branded’ can be a massive turn off for a lot of people.

As you will see from my newly made over website, my business has gone through an upgrade, and it took a lot of soul searching for me to do this.

Why?

Because when we go ‘slick and sexy’ it gives many people the impression we are too expensive for them to be able to work with us.

As someone who works with women starting over, as well as working with women who are already well established, I needed to find a middle ground; and in today’s world of online marketing finding that middle ground can be incredibly difficult.

The number of people who contact me wanting to work on my branding is interesting to say the least.  To many I am just another name on a list, and I feel they are only looking at the surface level stuff.

And I don’t do surface level stuff, far from it.

I am deep person, and a deep thinker.

A deep diver into my own soul, as well the souls of my clients to enable them to create the breakthroughs and the resutls they want in their lives.

I’m also spontaneous. I never used to be, although I did plan to be spontaneous, if that is even a thing.

Can you plan to be spontaneous? Hmmm… I wonder.

Anyway, I digresss…

Back to branding….

Do we have to?

Do we have to put out an image of ourselves which is so slick and sexy, polished and perfect when we as humans are all a perfect unperfect mix of emotions, order and mess?

Is it truthful?
Is it real?
And is it really a good thing to have the ‘same meat, different gravy’ solution to branding?

Looking at the website makeovers I have had in the past 3 years, the first one was very white, very ‘Google-esq’ but really quite masculine.

The second was more colourful and ocean inspired but it wasn’t positioning me where I wanted to be; it wasn’t going to win me the clients and exposure I wanted to take my business to the next level.

So it was time for another makeover; colours of the ocean, feminine, clean and clear, not so busy and easy to read, as well as being the shop window I wanted it to be; and this time I am really truly happy with it.

Branding a product or a service is one thing, but branding yourself, something completely different.

It takes a lot of soul searching. You have to see yourself for a start, and that can be a challenge for even the most successful and aware individuals amongst us.

As coaches and authors, many of us have a fast evolutionary pace. With each client call, each call with our own coaches, and with each book we write, we evolve fast.

We have to; and if we don’t, are we even present to the work we do?

I don’t do fake, or vanity metrics, and I don’t work with shallow people who can’t see beyond the obvious.

Wanting to work with more incredible women, sell more books and have more clients on my courses, I knew I needed to up my game when it came to branding and marketing myself.

I kept thinking of the quote “You can sell a bad product in great packaging, but you can’t sell a great product in bad packaging” and I knew I had to change the way I did things.

As someone in the PR and Marketing arena has recently described me ‘a very talented lady…. with soooo much to offer but … not represented well on line”

Hiding my talents with poor branding wasn’t doing me, my family or my business any good.

Being an online entrepreneur, having to have photos taken is something I had to get used to; and fast.

Up until 4 years ago you would not have found a photo of me anywhere.

Creating audio and video content is my next branding challenge, and yes, for me, it is a challenge.

Surely sharing all this may be detrimental to my professional image, but at the end of the day, I may be a business woman, I may be a brand, but I am also human.

Having feelings, a family, and a private life which I love, is something I am very protective of these days.

Remembering to grab my photo and take photos and videos all the time is not me, has never been me.  I love being in the moment and enjoying it.

In the world of fast paced consumerism, instant gratificaton and “now, now, now” video is essential for those wishing to get their message out to the masses, to get the sponsorship deals and all the sparkly ‘things’.

But is life really all about the sparkly things?

Hitting 42 a couple of weeks ago, I sat on the boat in the middle of the Southern Atlantic Ocean looking out at the horizon and realised, I don’t want the fast paced life.

I don’t want the ‘things’, I want real human connections, experiences and I am done with the shallowness of life that is becoming all to common place in today’s society.

Slowly down gives us perspective, and it’s good to be reminded that when it comes to branding and marketing, we can actually ‘over brand’ ourselves.

We can get lost in the world of ego, of being perfect and what others want us to be for them.

We can lose ourselves and our perspective on life, and there is nothing worse than losing yourself and all that you stand for simply for the sake of the online vanity metrics.

What are your thoughts? Let me know.

And if you like what you see, just know it is real, carefully considered and from the heart.

With love and gratitude to you, and for you,

Dawn x

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