With so many relationships breaking up, companies spending far too much on recruitment, poor customer service across a vast array of industries and negative mental health on the increase, it is time for us all to take a look at one of the root causes of it all. Well, it way beyond time if we’re being honest with ourselves!

Personally I believe it comes from a mind set that is growing in the world where so many simply want everyone else to do stuff for them.  We have started to live in what I call the ‘credit card culture’ – we want the goods but we are not prepared to work for them.  We want everything now.  We know that if we cannot pay then we can always go bankrupt.  The state will pay, and then we wonder why the schools and the NHS here in the UK are failing.  Our UK benefits system is nothing more than us paying people NOT TO WORK, as so eloquently put by someone I recently met. This concept is so alien to many around the world, especially in the ‘developing’ world (A world that has a better work ethic than most of those here in the UK on benefits).

When we look at the interactions between mother and child, partners, employer/employees we see many powerful dynamics at play.  Fears the parents have are passed onto the child, often resulting in what I call ‘bubble wrap parenting’ – protecting the child so much from the real world and everyday things such as dirt, that they grow up incapable, full of anxiety and with no self control.  This is one of the reasons why we have binge drinking when kids leave home for the first time, a lack of respect for authority, why companies are finding it hard to recruit competent team members and why so many relationships are not working.  Even Jennifer Lopez released a song recently “Ain’t your Mama” because she recognised the fact that female counterparts in a relationship are treated like a mother.  Many of my female friends joked that they have one more child than they actually do, simply because they are including their husband/partner in that number.

With so many men and women being incapable of the simplest of life skills, or unwilling to do them, we are creating generations of incompetence.  Many do not know to cook and clean, do household repairs, change a fuse in a plug (which here in the UK is becoming a thing of the past as manufacturers are now sealing the plug making it impossible to change a fuse, forcing us to buy new ones and add to the throw away culture that we have).  Many adults do not have the basic life skills, and so are unable to teach their children how to do them.

Now I am not one to brag, but when people discover that my children (13 and 9) can cook a delicious 3 course meal, do their own ironing,  do the laundry, can erect a 4 man tent, build a camp fire and read a traditional map, and have been able to for years, the look of surprise from other parents, combined with the comment “Oh I wish my kids would do all that!” it no longer amuses me as it used to, it saddens me.  Parents have given away their power and replaced it with fear of social judgements, fear of being seen as too strict. They have given up  enabling their children and are now disabling them.

Companies have allowed insurance companies to dictate to them what they can and cannot do based on ever decreasing comfort zones and abilities, which stem from a lack of belief in our abilities passed on from the negative mind sets and fears of others.  The fear that there will be legal action taken because so many are incapable of accepting responsibility for their actions.  If I fall over in a shop because I am not looking where I am going, then that is my fault.  Not the shops fault.  Am I going to sue mother nature when it rains? Of course not!

The time has come to start taking responsibility.  Start making our own money.  Start taking care of our own health by exercising and eating healthily, start exposing our children to dirt to increase their immune system rather than anti-bacing the life out of them.  It is time to get our own shit together instead of always relying on someone else to make things happen.

You want positive results in your life, then get your act together and make them happen!

You have it within you. So stop whinging and whining, stop blaming other people and just suck it up.  Own your responsibilities, embrace your full potential and play full out!

Remember, you only have one life, make it count!
Step up, get organised and get your shit together.

Hire me as your coach, and let’s see you perform to the best of your ability and create results in your life you never though possible!

And remember… I ain’t your Mama ;)



P.S. I am running a free 5-Day Relationship online challenge starting Monday 5th Dec.  Take this opportunity to transforms the relationships in your life at home, at work and in the wider community.  Click on the link below to register and receive my free e-book Inspiring Interdependence: Empowering Equality – A simple 3 step guide to relationships