As humans we are supposed to crave intimacy, love and human contact, but in today’s world intimacy is a word and reality which is becoming as elusive as our perceived freedoms.
Everything about our lives is recorded in one way or another, and we have allowed the need to be part of something to slowly erode our privacy and private lives.
Connected apps and sharing data with more organisations than we care to research, we just click ‘agree’ in the Terms and Conditions check box just because we want said app or access to something.
Is that something taking us to where we want to be though?
And how is sharing everything and anything about ourselves helping us keep intimacy in our romantic, family, social or business relationships?
Having made the choice to be an author, I knew that I was giving up a certain aspect of my privacy, especially given the fact I have used my life as a catalyst to highlight social issues, government and police corruption, as well as showcase what it has taken to get to where I have.
I didn’t become an author to become “famous”, nor did I choose to become an author so everyone thought they could own a piece of me.
I certainly didn’t become an author so those who I no longer chose to have in my life could feel rejected to such a degree they have made my departure from social media all about them.
One of the subjects covered in my 7 Week Author Course goes into the kind of author life we get to create, and as with any career this will evolve as we do over time.
One of the other things I also go into is how to handle the haters, the ones who are complete strangers who have no point of reference at all, as well as those we knew ‘way back when’ who see our success as an endless bottomless pit of cash, which if we do not hand over in a variety of ways, the bitchy, spiteful and often slanderous comments start appearing on different social media platforms.
The career of an author highlights many paradoxes in our life which we need to navigate carefully.
Grow too quickly overnight and we are catapulted into the spotlight, often without the skills or knowhow of what to do when it comes to dealing with the media.
Don’t grow quickly enough, or not promoting our books on ‘all platforms’, we don’t make any money, or so the social media giants will have us believe.
The thing is though, how we chose to live our life is entirely up to us. I choose a private life, in what some may think are luxury locations just because the nature around me is different.
My lifestyle and photos I’ve shared has created some very negative results in my life, results I don’t want.
Am I going to stop being me though? No, I’m not.
Am I going to stop writing books which expose social injustices and systemic corruption?
No, I’m not.
Returning to social media just because others think I’ve blocked them, when in fact I simply chose to boycott and walk away from a company who choose to violate privacy laws, propagate lies and prevent freedom of speech, is not an option for me.
As an author I choose to have a private life, because not only do prefer privacy, my children also want a private life.
As authors, by nature, we are private people. We like our solitude to read and write, reflect and create, so when we get to a tipping point in our author career, we have to reassess what’s next.
How do we take our income and impact to the next level without exposing ourselves?
Who do we learn from, especially when writing books of a social justice nature?
What level of our privacy are we prepared to give up so we can achieve the goals we want for our books, our readers and ultimately ourselves?
Only we can answer those questions.
If like me you’ve just gone through a major transitioning, and at a crucial pivot point in what some deem a dangerous series of books and re-releasing older books, then there are sometimes more questions than answers.
Everything coming together at once can seem overwhelming, but if we are to handle the next level of success, then learning to deal with and confront the overwhelm for what it is, is absolutely necessary.
Understanding our ‘why’ as authors is just as important as ‘the why’ for business owners, change makers and public figures, because whether we like it or not, the moment we choose to publish our books we become all three, even if they are of a fictional nature.
So what level of privacy are you looking for?
How private do you wish your life to be?
And how are you going to create that level of privacy for yourself and your family?
Our are you letting go of the notion of privacy altogether?