Being a Digital Ocean Nomad, I only have 27kgs of luggage to carry my ‘wardrobe’, ‘office’, books, toiletries, make up and personal ‘gym’ with me.
For some, the idea of not having all their ‘things’ with them which they’ve collected over the years is just too much to handle.
Others like the idea – in a ‘living the dream‘ concept kind of way – but then when they discover the reality, it is just something they could never do.
Because its not just not having a house full of stuff, it is the need to be around people, the familiarity of their surroundings, their community that they are not willing to step away from.
Last night as I got dressed up ready to party on the rooftop here in Colombia, celebrating the last full moon of 2021, with views over the Caribbean Sea, I took a moment to reflect on this last year.
I thought about where I was this time last year, not just on a planetary sense, but just how much I have grown, achieved, witnessed and experienced.
Once I was up on the roof, I started looking down at the buildings below, hearing the Afro-Caribbean Latino beats and rifts, I couldn’t quite believe I was in Colombia.
I may have been here 5 months, but each and every area I have visited here in Colombia is so very different. Much like all the different small towns and villages I travelled through over my 9 months in Brasil.
And then of course there was my journey through the Amazon bringing me to Colombia, via a day in Peru in the heart of the Amazonas.
I’ve written 7 books, a couple which were anthologies with other incredible women. Another 3 are about to be published and I’m already working on another anthology, with a book I am co-authoring with a dear friend of mine now in progress.
Then there’s 3 client books well underway, a collection of articles I’ve written for Preeminence Magazine, MSP News Global, and the collection of human rights articles I’ve written for the 75th Anniversary celebrations of the UDHR.
I’ve created an author academy for activists and those wishing to be published authors in the genres of human rights, social justice and cultural cohesion; something we are launching early next year.
A lot has been achieved professionally, and even more so on a personal level.
I’ve reclaimed my privacy and integrity by deleting my social media platforms, have become a Padi Diver, passed my course modules which are leading me to my PhD in International Law and Social Justice with the University of Oxford and started to prepare the theory and practical exams for my up and coming YachtMaster qualification.
I have met so many lovely people over the last year, and have even allowed myself to open up and let some of them in. Not an easy thing for me to do.
Keeping people at a distance is my default setting, and has served me well. I enjoy my own company, and find other people a bit too much to be honest.
(And I most definitely prefer the company of dogs to humans I can tell you!)
Yes, I can deliver results in business, during interviews and can be personable and friendly when out and about, but I have to mentally, emotionally and energetically prepare myself for interactions with others.
I was referred to once as the ‘ultimate example’ of how best to do business and life as the ‘introvert extrovert’.
Last night as the rooftop party kicked off, I was still preparing my new moon party make up, with the limited resources I have… because like I say, everything I need and have with me needs to fit into 27kgs.
I am transitioning into the new phase of my life. And I felt the power of the moon, so it was appropriate to acknowledge this power in my makeup, not that I am a make-up artist or anything, but hey, I can’t be talented at everything.
I also knew I would be the only one at the party wearing anything like the kind of make up I had chosen. But I didn’t care.
I don’t live my life for other people anymore. I do what makes me happy, and as the music flowed, I got lost in my own world – as I always do when the music comes on.
Music, just like being on the ocean or deep into books, takes me to my happy place. A place where I feel total freedom and inner peace.
Up on the roof, I looked up at the moon, feeling the power of the winds blowing down from the mountains of the Sierra Nevada and it was such a magical experience; one which brought with it mixed emotions.
I miss someone. Deeply. Someone who I think of everytime I look at the moon. Someone, who after two years of messages back and forth, discussing everything and anything on such a deep and private level hasn’t reached out to me. Looking back I realised every interaction we ever had was instigated by me, as was the same with a lot of my friendships.
To have realised that without me taking the initiative, taking the lead, no conversations happen, and that hurt. I am not prepared to keep hurting myself wondering if he’ll ever message me just to see how I am.
The radio silence has been deafening, which seems crazy as we’ve never met in person.
The amount of time spent together in conversations, the kind of conversations had, the laughter, the feeling of safety, just everything about our friendship, was incredibly powerful for me. So I thanked him for his time, sent him love and wished him well; as I have done with many other one-sided friendships / relationships.
Then I turned inwards, found my happy place, allowed the magic of the moon to wash over me and allowed the music to take me places I hadn’t been for a long time.
Dancing by myself, smiling and giggling away whilst in my own world, people could have easily assumed I was intoxicated with alcohol or drugs, but when you are truly happy with yourself, at peace within yourself, alcohol and drugs become a pointless waste of a life.
And I love my life.
Even if it is a life of travelling the world with just 27kgs.
I didn’t have the extra glitter sparkle this make up could have benefitted from… for one it’s pretty hard to find in remote places but the truth is… I am the sparkle.
And so are you.
So remember your sparkle, discover the next layer of it and keep reminding yourself of how truly blessed you are to get to wake up and give life another go.
Have a wondrously gorgeous holiday season all of you in which ever way you spend your time
With love to you all,
*And for those thinking of suggesting I get a Kindle instead of carrying books around the world with me, please don’t because Kindles don’t weigh much and can’t be stacked on top of one another… so pretty useless when it comes to leg raises, squats or bicep and tricep curls. Ciao! ?